Last Seconds of Mankind,
(A dialogue on Twenty years later, the internet is mainstream. Notes iOS,
imitate Baldessari in actions and speech)

The Grumbler
OH NO! It's the continuation of conceptual art by other means (again). Twenty three pages of détournementscalembours and "processual" crap. Notes IOS? You gotta be kiddin' me. Instead of the melting ice cube you get to watch a smart-phone running out of battery. Meanwhile, there's this worthless hour by hour register of everything and a pair of boots (nothing interesting, that is). "The art work of the art work", aboulia, narcisism. Every trick in the wannabe's manual: a scent of body art, the formless, a little chunk of site/non-site, the dead ends of institutional critic and the critic of institution... "Curate me", he cries, and he is right: there should be a cure for this kind of nonsense.... La place de mon oeuvre? Around six in the morning, the pain in the ass is unbearable. And still seventeen hours to go... 
The Optimist
Oh, but it makes you think...You know, about some broken promises... with irony, you know, Duchamp and all that...
The Grumbler
You're kiddin'? There is nothing left to think. Conceptual art and the internet became avatars of turbo-capitalism, that's all. Stock shares and artist certificates, side by side in the safe deposit box of some hedge fund, plutocrat ass. Farewell to the libertarian sharing of information; our sweet revolution is dead. "I will not make any more boring art" says the tombstone inscription. if you want the Newspeak translation: "I will not make any more unprofitable art". You want art? give me money, mother fucker. Green-kisses, yeah...      
The Optimist
Ah, but that's where you're wrong! The guy who did this, you know, no matter how hard he cries, there's no chance the artworld will ever listen. In his own country there are plenty well-known artists, you know, real pro, real competitors; way out of his amateur league. He's not getting younger, has no pedigree and the places where he shows are laughable. His stuff is worthless and it will remain so. No way buying his book can be a good investment or a reasonable calculated action.  
The Grumbler
Yeah, you got that right... So?
The Optimist
So, it can only be a gesture of expenditure, a kind of exchange with no profit, a kind of potlatch. And that's precisely where you're wrong: it's not all about the money. There's something else out there. Maybe the guy who did these notes knows it, after all. Maybe he is experiencing and sharing a certain act of freedom... Secretive and common at the same time, you know... Like a lost warrior or a zen master, or something. Here, take a better look inside, it even has some nice jokes, almost witty, you know... 
The Grumbler
Now, you're really kiddin' me. 
You like it so much, you buy it. I'm savin' mine. I know a dealer... Gonna get me a Sarmento's silkscreen print. Gonna get me some real piece of art, yeah! 


DR. FauxTroll, Fevereiro 2018

the process

Digital print and Typography.
50 copies were made, each one duly signed and numbered.
Published by Oficina do Cego
Lisbon 2018



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